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“as long as one continues to use one’s misfortune to one’s advantage in order to be “special,” one will always need that misfortune.” As long as your misfortune is the thing that makes you special, then you will always need that and won’t be able to get
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“In fact, if we were to ask ourselves who is the strongest person in our culture, the logical answer would be, the baby. The baby rules and cannot be dominated” The baby has its parents jumping at its whims. It’s really powerful. Excerpt From: Ichiro Kishimi & Fumitake Koga.
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“they are sick or injured, or suffering the mental anguish of heartbreak.” Definition of misfortune, leading to the discussion regarding people seeking to assuage their inferiority through sympathy. Excerpt From: Ichiro Kishimi & Fumitake Koga. “The Courage to Be Disliked.” Atria, 2018-05-08. Apple Books.
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“Such people try to make themselves “special” by way of their experience of misfortune, and with the single fact of their misfortune try to place themselves above others” Seeking the sympathy to make yourself feel less inferior, again, looking to others when you should be resolving these things yourself. Excerpt
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“It’s because one’s feeling of inferiority is strong that one boasts. One feels the need to flaunt one’s superiority all the more” Even though you seem to be saying, look at how special I am, what you are really showing is how insecure you are. Excerpt From:
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“The one who boasts does so only out of a feeling of inferiority” The only reason to seek praise from others for your accomplishments to make yourself feel better than you do. Excerpt From: Ichiro Kishimi & Fumitake Koga. “The Courage to Be Disliked.” Atria, 2018-05-08. Apple Books.
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“The healthiest way is to try to compensate through striving and growth” The healthy way to overcome your feeling of inferiority to work towards a realistic solution. Excerpt From: Ichiro Kishimi & Fumitake Koga. “The Courage to Be Disliked.” Atria, 2018-05-08. Apple Books.
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“no one is capable of putting up with having feelings of inferiority for a long period of time. Feelings of inferiority are something that everyone has, but staying in that condition is too heavy to endure forever.” Feelings of inferiority are supposed to spur us to improve ourselves, but if
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“ In other words, you’re not equipped with the courage to change your lifestyle” You could, if you weren’t a fucking coward All funny business aside, the reason we don’t change when we want to is that we lack the courage to rock the boat and do something
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“apparent cause and effect.” That is to say, you convince yourself that there is some serious causal relationship where there is none whatsoever” You believe something to be true, you start looking for things to confirm your belief, but what you are observing is a casual relationship and you haven’
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“One tries to get rid of one’s feeling of inferiority and keep moving forward. One’s never satisfied with one’s present situation—even if it’s just a single step, one wants to make progress. One wants to be happier. There is absolutely nothing wrong with the state
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“Adler is saying that the pursuit of superiority and the feeling of inferiority are not diseases but stimulants to normal, healthy striving and growth” It’s natural and healthy to want to improve oneself, and because growth is difficult, it is natural to feel inferior when you try to grow.